You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
