he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize