Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
