they need to just BURY HIM!
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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