Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
