using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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