Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
