so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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