I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
