I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
