I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Randomize
