Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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