YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
