I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I need a beard to bite.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
