i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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