I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Do you have feelings for this penis?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
