with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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