So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
