I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Randomize
