Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
