buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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