I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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