This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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