I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I need to calm my uterus...
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Randomize
