I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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