are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
