Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I lost the right to judge tonight
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
