I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
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