I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I am available for nakedness
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
