Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
