I wish I only lived at night.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
