So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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