i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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