i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
