We need to rekindle our bromance
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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