would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
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