They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
