girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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