Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize
