is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
whose parrot is this?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize