Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Randomize
