I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
