So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
There r osticjed everywhere
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
