U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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