You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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