Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize