So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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