At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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