I think my vagina is haunted
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
