He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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