I hate all girls vehemently.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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